The Wedding was supposed to start at 4:30 so we left the house at 3:30, arrived at 4:00 and waited for the wedding party until after 6:00. Over eager victims of Rwandan time yet again, but well worth the wait.
The reception is completely different from wedding receptions in the U.S. The chairs for the guests are set up like the church. The groom's guests sit on the left and the bride's guests sit on the right. There are no dinner tables because dinner isn't served. The wedding party, including immediate family, sits on a platform in the front. Theree bride, groom, and their best man and maid of honor sit at a table in the front, with the rest of the wedding party behind them in rows.
After everyone is seated, each side picks a member of their family, typically an elderly uncle or father to finalize the bonding of the families. These two men sit and drink banana beer that is made of a mixture of homemade beer from the towns of both the bride and groom. The two men introduce themselves to each other and sit and talk for a bit. Then the bride and groom come to sit with them and also must drink from the huge jug of beer.
After all of this beer drinking business is done, traditional Rwandan dancers come in to dance for the couple. The women wear tank tops with one shoulder shawl type coverings and a long skirt. The men wear crisscrossed suspenders and a skirt made of dried, long grasses. There is a choir that is accompanied by drummers that provide the music for the dancers. The group comes in and out throughout the evening to entertain the couple and their guests.
They also have the bride and groom toast each other...with Citron Fanta. It's fabulous! Then they make their way over to the cake. The cake has a house on a platform instead of the bride and groom. There are two towers one on each side that are given to the mothers of the bride and groom that are intended to signify the grandchildren they will give them. The friends of the bride help cut up the cake and pass out a piece to each guest. They also give out a Fanta or Coke to everyone.
The best part was towards the end when the dancers came back...bearing gifts. I'm not sure who bought these gifts for the couple, but they are symbolic of the traditional gifts given to help the couple start their new life together. The bride goes first and she was given banana leaf, handwoven floor mats, baskets, and other house related gifts. The groom follows, receiving gifts used to protect his family: a spear, a bow and arrow set, and a leopard skin to display to send the message to enemies that he is a good hunter.
After all the gift giving comes the dance off. That's right a dance off. The dancers start and then one man from each family got up to challenge each other. Guests would run up to them and give money to the best dancer. Everyone was up out of their seats cheering and laughing, watching these men do their thing.
Each relative is given the opportunity to get up and present their gift. Some people decided to make announcements to offer cows, goats, or chicken to the couple. Cows are a sign of wealth in Rwanda and each milk cow costs about $1,000 USD. This couple was given two. Innocent, who took us to the wedding, offered his help to his cousin, the bride, in getting a job.
After the wedding reception, the real party begins as guests move on to the couple's new home and carry in all their new furnature and food for everyone. It was getting too late so we weren't able to stay to go to the house, but I heard it's a good time for all. There's an impromptu dance party that starts and everyone finally relaxes without much formality. An interesting twist to the wedding, and as someone who's moved too many times, much appreciated!
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